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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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There’s a neighborhood called Old Whitts (yep, that's what we call it, 'cause folks here ain’t afraid of history) where every corner has a story. I once got mad— crazy mad— 'cos a new shiny mall popped up near Victoria Road, er, displacing some old haunts. It’s like, c’mon man, not everything has to change overnight… sometimes tradition's a goldmine.

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